Leaving home to go on this dream trip was SOOO much harder than I thought it would be. I was a mess. My kids were a mess. My shirt was literally soaked from my children's tears, begging me not to leave or to take them with me. I almost gave up my dream. In the moment it seemed like I was causing my children so much pain to go on this dream trip. What a horrible mother, right?!! I called one of my best friends on the drive to the airport - SOBBING - begging her to remind me why I wanted to go on this trip in the first place. Bless her heart. She helped me remember that I'm choosing this trip for my kids to know that their dreams can come true.

All of this brought me to the stark realization of why more of our dreams don't "come true." Honestly, chasing dreams can be CRAZY-scary. It's an extremely vulnerable thing to even tell someone our dreams, let alone take action on bring them to pass. What if people don't understand? What if your dream is stupid? And worst of all, what if God doesn't want my dream to come true? Even though no one would consciously say they wondered that, I believe on a subconscious level too many of us believe that if our dream was supposed to have happened, it would have already happened. We leave it in the hands of fate/God. However, dreams aren't always like that.

that God and the Universe give them to us when we choose to receive them.

I had expected everyone in my life to be cheering me on.. maybe even throwing roses at my feet for courageously chasing a dream. I was actually really surprised at how few people acted genuinely excited for me. All-in-all, it seemed like most people in my life didn't understand my dream and were interested in talking me out of it.

This led me to learn a powerful lesson:

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Whenever I'm feeling cranky about someone else's great "luck" and all the awesome things coming their way, I have to take a step back and recognize that the only reason I'm feeling cranky is because I've stopped believing that things work out for me and that my dreams matter.  Something to ponder...

Of course other's reactions to be taking my dream trip to Bali right now (yes, there was a lot of postponing my dream discussion from others) led to me second-guessing the validity of my dream. I mean, if everyone can't see how great it is... what if it isn't that great? In the end, I had to live true to me and the dream God had placed in my heart and go on faith that it would be worth it. I had to choose to step toward the dream courageously, holding my Savior's hand for Him to guide my path.

Really resonating with Ganesha "remover of obstacles" right now. Feeling like it's messages of listening more, peacefully digesting all of life's experiences, retaining the good amp; releasing any pain, and thinking big are perfect for me right now. Love how God can answer my prayers amp; teach me things through lots of means. I'll be watching for more Ganesha types of lessons while in Bali

NEXT DAY:

Good morning Taipei! Just survived my first 15 hour flight over the pacific. Wow. Was more intense than I thought, but still good. Sat next to some sweet older Taiwanese men who looked out for me. At about the 5-6 hours in the air point I thought I was going to lose it. Packed in this massive 747 plane like sardines over nothing but water. So grateful for the distraction of movies to stop any anxiety amp; get some rest. Crazy how after 13 hours in the plane the breakfast they served actually tasted amazing (I ate it ravenously since I was limited before to only the snacks I brought). Breakfast choices were eggs amp; sausage or seafood porridge. Bet you can't guess what I chose (I wasn't very adventurous). Now hanging out in Taipei until my flight to Bali leaves in a few hours.

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ARRIVED IN BALI:

First night in Bali was magical! Kelly took me to this way cool Old Man's beach where I got some tasty Dragonfruit amp; Mango gelato. We went to Desa Seni for dinner which is this magical place made out of various gorgeous huts with paths lit with colored lanterns in between them. It's a popular yoga retreat space because it's so heavenly. Enjoyed some amazing fish tacos. Then Kelly amp; I went amp; got foot amp; head massages before we climbed into bed at this gorgeous hotel. Amazing night!

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